Faith for Life’s Journey #6 – Deterrents to Faith Pt. 4

Post #6 = The Deterrents to Faith Pt. 4

Road Block #8: The Fear Factor

TYPICAL WORDING: “The topic of religion and faith is unsettling and sometimes creepy. I like to avoid thinking about things like death, spirits, or the next life.”

PROBLEM: Talk of God, Karma, Nirvana, altered states of consciousness, Heaven and Hell, and life after death can lead to feelings of apprehension or even trepidation. Many common folks just don’t want to think about such hefty, alien, or bizarre topics. They are more at home chatting about everyday happenings – stuff they can wrap their minds around and which cheer their hearts. The unknown, frankly, is something some people want to leave unknown. “Let sleeping dogs lie,” is their motto.

SOLUTION: Life is what it is! It can’t be swept under the rug. It has to be dealt with. There are lots of things in life we don’t want to think about: Getting braces, taking our SATs, asking a girl out for the first time, the boss on the first day at work, things that go bump in the night, etc… Yet we still have to deal with them. Life has a way of pushing itself on us even when we want to elude it. This includes things about faith. The uneasiness of considering faith can be lessened by a careful and thoughtful guide or introduction.

EXPLANATION: Life forces us to consider things we would like to block out, even terrible things like loss of a cherished family member, a best friend moving far away, getting diagnosed with cancer, a messy divorce, etc… A knowledgeable friend or guide brought alongside us at a needy or tender time is a true blessing. Likewise, orientation to religion helps many learn to think about it in the right way. There are those who can help you begin to feel at ease pondering the deep things of life.

Of course, not all the fear can or should be eliminated from life’s mystery. Life is awesome and wild. What makes it unpredictable adds excitement. Life shouldn’t be made into a little Teddy Bear to control. However getting a taste of God’s beneficial and patient love can attract you to spiritual topics rather than repel you. Faith is an adventure, but it is one for which you can prepare. There are guides, both written and personal, to help you. Many have walked the paths of faith before you, and have left behind their advice. Considering their example and reading their works will smooth the way for you and remove unnecessary angst. These forerunners to the faith have left you the proper way to think about life & death in light of God’s promises and actions.

Not to consider their advice is, not only to miss the benefits of faith, but to cower behind a present facade of protection. For how do you know that by avoiding faith you will avoid what you fear? Far too many assume they are safe just ignoring the question of God or the next life. Is it safe to pretend nuclear weapons do not exist in our world or to turn a blind eye to terrorism in hopes it will just disappear? Hiding behind the false hope of ignoring reality is never wise or safe. For reality will come back to bite you, unless you prepare for it.

Besides, from personal experience (something I will share in a future post) the questions a wise and beneficial faith answers will not scare your heart but reassure it. Jesus said, “Let not your heart be trouble neither let it be afraid. You believe in God. Believe also in Me.” John 14. Truth and spiritual discovery ultimately leads to paradise – a bucolic, winsome, and attractive end. While I don’t agree with the famous words, “We have nothing to fear but fear itself,” I do see divine love in the mix which more than adequately calms the fear factor. We actually have nothing to fear but God Himself, and if He works for us, not against us, then… well, our present fear can be turned into future love. Isn’t this what you want? So work through your discomforts with me, and gain the best outcome for yourself.

Road Block #9 = The Disappointment Factor

TYPICAL WORDING: “I tried religion already, and it really let me down. I’m not interested anymore.”

PROBLEM: Some have backed off the faith they were taught early in life. They tried it, in some cases immersed themselves in it, but due to some great disappointment along the way, they are now beyond it. They don’t want to turn back the clock or re-experience the pain. Whatever church or institution they had joined proved to be unloving, unreal, or unresponsive during a formative time or a fearful crisis. The pastor, priest, monk, leader, or rabbi proved to be unloving or even a hypocrite. That is when the feelings of love toward religion dissolved. It left the person feeling like a victim and concluding all of religion was just a sham. None was genuine. After their horrendous event, they adopted a new slogan toward religion, “No mas!”

SOLUTION: Disappointment in religion is real and in some cases devastating. We should not underestimate how hard it is to recover from it. Jesus told us there would be many stumbling blocks in life, but woe to the one by whom those stumbling blocks came. So Jesus warned how bad some religious people could be especially toward the young or naive. It is reassuring to know God has promised to judge those who place stumbling blocks before people’s attempts to come to faith. Jesus warned stringently that in religion there would be false prophets, false apostles, false gospels, and false teachers. His harshest recorded denunciations were against the religious leaders of his day whom the masses admired. It may be hard to separate worthless, evil people in religion from caring, genuine people, but that is the truth, and that is what must happen. Not to do so is to remain defeated not triumphant.

EXPLANATION: Since no one can have unlimited experience with something as broad as spirituality, to walk away from all faith due to past lousy experiences is only to punish yourself twice. It makes no sense. It would seem logical that those who have most been burned by religion, would be the most careful to get it right the next time. Abandoning the pursuit is not a solution and not very smart. Learning from past mistakes is the wisest course. There may be a good reason why you had a bad experience. This is especially true since the solution of giving up is actually not possible. One will still choose a faith of some kind, even if he thinks he has abandoned all. And that faith chosen may lead to a worse end than the present discouragement.

So your experience actually is a valuable lesson in what not to pursue, but it should not discourage you from more discerning pursuits. I know that some seekers may be exasperated and let out a sigh, “But religion proved to be weights on my shoulders not wings for my soul.” True enough, but the final word has not been spoken. You may choose to focus only on how you were manipulated or abused. You may remember the feeling of being a fool when someone took off with your money or even your wife in the name of God. Religious people can be cunning, money hungry, liars who know how to use religion to get away with almost anything. The gullibility among the religious faithful sometimes runs rampant. Many are easy pickings for the Devil’s dogs. That’s life! But to dwell on the loss and your feelings is to engage in destructive self-pity. It gets you nowhere!

Self-pity and doubting is not a strategy for victory and sanity. Nor is doubting a panacea for your problems. Skepticism can lead to ruin and rob you of truth and joy. It is not more intelligent to doubt everything. Doubting alone as a strategy is a lopsided, unworkable plan. It is a decision to follow only one strand of evidence while purposely ignoring the other side of the evidence. Skeptics can have blinders on just like believers can.

You may have observed people of faith you admire, but you are convinced, “It won’t work for me like it did for them.” You may even wonder, “What if I am cursed or destined for something bad?” Or you may question, “If there is a good god out there, why did he let that bad thing happen to me? Why does my life seem so so neglected? It seems like no one is looking out for me.”

As we will show in the posts to come, one should never doubt that a good God will bless your life like He has for others, if you search earnestly and honestly. Christ, for example, taught that he was “gentle and humble of heart.” So learning from him will prove invaluable to your soul. Someone who promises never to abandon you, and has proven His power already in human history, is worth pursuing with all your might.

Road Block #10 = The Cost Factor

TYPICAL WORDING: “If I follow a religion, I know I will have to sacrifice some things I hold dear. So, I just don’t think religion, whatever benefit it may afford, is worth the effort and sacrifice. I live for me and for now. So count me out.”

PROBLEM: There is a cost to becoming a man or woman of faith. You may be fairly convinced a faith is true, and even admire others for their faith, yet you just can’t get past the sticker price: “What if my spouse wants to leave me after I choose religion? What if my parents or children think I’m nuts and start ostracizing me? What if I don’t get promoted at work? What if … what if … ” Yes, friends may ridicule you, acquaintances may shun you, and family may scold your new found faith. The isolation from your friends and coworkers may prove a heavy cost to pay.

SOLUTION: But weigh the benefits to your costs. It is wise to count the cost of any endeavor prior to pursuing it. In religion, depending on the faith, the cost may or may not be worth it. It all depends on what is guaranteed for you. Sort out what is wishful thinking, and what is solid expectation. What is reasonably deduced benefit, and what is self-contradictory fluff? Answering these questions is crucial. Many from different faiths will enthusiastically urge you that devotion to their cause is worth it. However not all have the evidence to back up their lofty claims, and therefore, not all are to be trusted. The risks with religion and faith are great. The land mines many. However, the true loss is to those who sit on their hands and end up losing everything anyway. Those who refuse to trust and those who trust in the wrong thing will still end up in the same boat. There is only one safe passage forward – choose the right boat with the right captain.

EXPLANATION: Anyone who is not in the super-rich category and has to follow a rigid monthly budget knows that every large purchase has to be evaluated carefully for cost/benefit outcomes. Every benefit has a cost, and hopefully every cost has some benefit, but they must each be weighed judiciously. A choice to purchase a quality piece of furniture may simultaneously be a choice to abandon a much needed vacation. Conversely, a choice to travel the world may be a choice to commute this next year in a worn out, used car when one arrives home from vacation. Every cost must be evaluated.

The same is true with faith. Every faith commitment must be weighed against the costs. What does the particular faith promise? Who promised it? What is their credentials? What can the faith deliver? How will I know? And what costs does it require? Look at the two in a ledger side-by-side. Are the two congruent or disproportionate?

When a suicide bomber is told he will gain 70 virgins in the next life, how credible is that promise? What backs it up? Is there enough evidence to warrant killing self and slaughtering innocent bystanders? A Scripture? And who wrote the scripture? How does that work with our conscience? How could someone be rewarded for killing the innocents?

When a Buddhist teacher promises Nirvana, can that concept even be explained? What is Nirvana, and why should anyone want it? Does it even exist? How would someone know? Is it just one man’s word? Is it even worth gaining it, if it does exist? Why should someone give up what he/she has to gain it?

When Christ promised a resurrection of the body, life eternal, bliss in the next life, what credentials did He prove He had? What guarantees and what costs are associated with following the man from Galilee? What signs did He leave? What way of verification did he leave for an average person to know?

The Bible provides much evidence and many promises. These must be pondered carefully when one thinks of cost-to-benefit-ratio. Here are just a few to whet your appetite:

Matthew 16:26 “For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?”

Matthew 13:45-46 “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking fine pearls, 46 and upon finding one pearl of great value, he went and sold all that he had and bought it.”

Romans 10:11 “For the Scripture says, ‘WHOEVER BELIEVES IN HIM WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.’”

Mark 10:29-30 “Jesus said, ‘Truly I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or farms, for My sake and for the gospel’s sake, 30 but that he will receive a hundred times as much now in the present age, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and farms, along with persecutions; and in the age to come, eternal life.’”

As an important footnote … those who would abandon you because you find faith and happiness in a new worldview would only prove they were never on your side in the first place. They enjoyed the old you for what they could get out of you, not for true love. If they only liked you because you were like them, true love was absent all along. Isn’t it better to discover that about them now, than after you have committed more time and energy into the relationship? Be assured, no marriage will be split by truth or love unless there was no truth or love in the marriage in the first place.

I hope these last few posts about removing roadblocks have helped you. They may not have brought you to faith, but my hope was that they allow you to proceed forward. Take the next step. Faith can be for winners and careful thinkers, but faith must be selected carefully. For not all faiths are created equal. Not all faiths are beneficial and worthy of our faith.

Next time we begin a look at the factors which should help us decide upon a proper, beneficial, and true faith. You may be surprised with how many of them you already agree.